Also known as subjective well-being, life Satisfaction, differs from the current, in the moment feelings; it measures how individuals evaluate their life as a whole. Happiness or joy is an experience that exists in the current moment and can change rapidly. Life satisfaction, on the other hand, is more of a reflection of one’s whole life, looking at the bigger picture. It is influenced by a multitude of factors: our attitudes in general towards life, how we feel about our personal and family situation, the satisfaction we feel from the activities and the occupations we pursue, our perceived financial security, the relationships we have with family, friends, and colleagues, our physical and/or mental state, as well as our connection to the spiritual, to mention a few.

When asked to rate their general satisfaction with life on a scale from 0 to 10, on average, people across the OECD gave it a 6.5 grade. The number of countries that scored 5 or below was significant. This means that in these countries, the average individual feels that their satisfaction with life is at 5 or below on a scale of 0 to 10. That is quite astounding considering the history of humanity and the progress civilization has made over the past centuries. Again, this highlights that something is clearly not working today.

My question to you is: what should our aspiration be in life? Just to be satisfied? Or do you want to thrive? We need to elevate our expectations, raise the bar, and pursue a purposeful life in order to live at our ultimate potential. The 7 Pillars Framework is for all those who do not agree to accept mediocrity—or a score of 5 out of 10 in life satisfaction—who wish to take action and attempt to shift up the scale.
How Satisfied are you with Life? Are you curious of where you would rate yourself? In Chapter IV of the book, you can take a quick life satisfaction questionnaire to assess where you stand today.

It’s Not About Chasing Happiness

We may want to pursue many positive emotions in life, including joy, fulfillment, enthusiasm, purpose, passion, connectedness, and gratitude to mention just a few. Happiness is just one emotion that is linked to an overall positive emotional state. According to studies by psychologists at the University of California, Berkeley, “paradoxically, the more people valued and were encouraged to value happiness as a separate life goal, the less happy they were” [1]. This is well documented in multiple published research. As Catalino et al. make the case, it is not about chasing happiness, “deliberately trying to maximize one’s happiness in the moment may backfire”, or overly focusing on it: “the act of simply paying continuous attention to one’s happiness may boomerang, leading to less happiness” [2]. Therefore, happiness should NOT be a goal per se.

“It is the very pursuit of happiness that thwarts happiness.”

― Victor E. Frankl

We are therefore faced with a conundrum. We want to improve our overall life satisfaction and lead a purpose-driven life, experiencing a whole array of positive emotions. However, research and studies have shown that we should not pursue happiness directly as a goal. This framework suggests that you make improvements across the 7 pillars of your life, which should lead to an improved sense of connection with others, with your activities and occupations, improving your physical and mental health, and experiencing more positive emotions overall. I propose that improvements across the 7 pillars lead, over time, to an improvement in both perceived and actual well-being.

What about negative emotions? Emotions such as fear, anxiety, and anger have an important role to play in your life, and you develop them as part of your survival mechanisms. It is when they are no longer adapted to the circumstances and become dominant that you need to take notice and reestablish a healthier mix. Obstacles and suffering are inevitable. Therefore, you are setting yourself up for failure if you set your target on being always in a positive mood. I use the analogy of waves, which rise and fall. Your emotions will fluctuate over time depending on the specifics of your situation. As you familiarize yourself with the tools, you should be able to build an upward path that rises over time, and which helps you reach new highs. Although suffering and pain are part of life, you will become more resilient and be able to bounce back more rapidly. Your physical, mental and emotional pillars will have been reinforced. Also, your connections to others, to your environment, and to your occupations and spirit will be strengthened.

Rather than chase happiness, why not attempt to actualize your full potential? Be the best of who you can be. And in the process, help others actualize their own potential: spouse, children, friends, and family. Just imagine, for a short while, a life where you make conscious decisions, feel connected to others and to the environment, and experience episodes of peace in your heart and mind. You don’t let external events throw you off balance. You stay grounded, centered on your core. You observe quietly, decide, and move forward consciously. You become Aware, Assess, Accept and take Action (AAAA). You understand that life is full of unexpected turns, obstacles, and suffering. However, you welcome the challenges of your own unique adventure and look forward to the next discovery. You nurture yourself, care for yourself, your body and mind. You have a sense of purpose.

The 7 Pillars contains over 30 different exercises to help you on your journey and apply the concepts to the specifics of your situation.

References

1. Rosin, Hanna. “Why Are Americans So Anxious?” The New York Times. Last modified October 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com/2016/10/30/books/review/america-the-anxious-ruth-whippman.html?smprod=nytcore-ipad&smid=nytcore-ipad-share&_r=0.
2. Catalino, Lahnna I., Sara B. Algoe, and Barbara L. Fredrickson. “Prioritizing positivity: An effective approach to pursuing happiness?” Emotion 14, no. 6 (2014), 1155-1161. doi:10.1037/a0038029.